It’s actually July. WHY JULY TO ME?!

I was in my blog settings looking something up when I discovered my previous un-published post a couple of days ago. Whoops! I’m not quite sure why I didn’t publish it at the time; obviously it’s unfinished but I don’t know why.

Either way, there you go. Not that anybody’s reading these anymore since Facebook disabled the ability to automatically share these things, thus making it entirely useless to me and bringing about my deleting of the account for good. The fact it’s become a data gathering machine for nefarious purposes and an echo chamber for old racist white people might also have had something to do with it.

Anyway, onwards and sideways! That’s right, I’m moving in a diagonal. Not sure what that means, right now it’s a stream of consciousness. You’re welcome.

PS: This is long. Get yourself a strong drink or tranquilizer.

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Hey it’s February

Sooo … yeah, obviously it’s not February, it’s almost the end of July. Looks like I wrote this and then bailed on it, but figured I’d post this anyway and then follow it up.


How did that happen?!

My last post was exactly three months ago. I was about to start a new job, and my mind was full of ideas and theories and stratagems about what might need to be done, how I might achieve it, and how I would justify my ideas.
The 2FA/MFA post came out of that and, I’ll admit, it ran on a little longer than I intended. C’est la vie as the French say.

“So what’s been going on in the last three months?!” asked literally nobody.
Well dear phantom reader, I shall tell you, while I sip PG Tips from my mug and persist in trying to shake the odd longing that I’ve had for the past few days to be back in England during Spring.

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Nine Months

If, instead of moving to America, I had gotten pregnant instead, I would be having a baby about now.

That’s a patently ridiculous statement – after all I don’t want kids – but it’s interesting to me as a measure of time. My last post on this subject was at the end of December, and it was very much a commentary on the sadness and loneliness that can take hold when relocating from a country that you’ve spent your whole life in.

Thankfully, the nine-month report is a much happier, healthier, and altogether bouncier child (sorry).

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Homesickness

It’s that time. Time to talk about the Big H. No, not Harvey Weinstein, the other thing. Homesickness.

A few months ago I dumped a bunch of potential titles for posts into my Drafts folder to remind me what I had ideas about. One title was simply Homesickness, and AJ said “Well, you can’t write about that yet, because you haven’t gotten over it.”

I think I’ve been truly homesick just once before, back in September 2003 (or was it October?) when my family drove me the three hours from Wales to Manchester, and dumped me there. I remember feeling a profound sense of loss that day when they drove away, leaving me living on my own for the first time ever. This experience has been wholly different, for obvious reasons.

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Smarter than the Average Home

If you know me, you’ll know that I like my tech. I’ve worked in the sector for twelve years now (actually I think it’s coming up to thirteen … yikes) and have paddled in the seas of tech experimentation at various depths over the years.

After my abortive university escapade, I had my water-cooled custom-cased gaming rig, as well as my own Exchange and Web server. I cared about tenths of degrees of my CPU and GPU, how fast my RAM was clocked, and could tell the difference between a 5400 and 7200RPM spinning disk.

It’s not quite like that anymore.

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On Comet! On Cupid! On Donner and … Purple?

If you’re in the United States of America and you’re looking for a new mattress, I got you. www.onpurple.com is the only place you need to be looking. You’ll thank me for the whimsical and very amusing videos that they use to illustrate their products, but I implore you to buy, experience, and then you can thank me again when you’ve had the best sleep of your life.

The only drawback is that going home to spend time with family, staying in less-than-five-star hotels, and sleeping on the train is just going to make you wish you were back at home in your own bed. Sorry!

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Snow Joke

I’ve been wrestling with homesickness for the last few weeks, which is something I’ll cover in another post another time. As a result, I suppose I’ve been subconsciously a bit all over the place when it comes to emotional equilibrium.

Last Saturday, things got a little odd, and it’s all because of the weather.

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Move, bitch

In case anyone thinks I’m being in any way sexist, I am of course referring to the Ludacris song ‘Move Bitch’ that has been co-opted into some of the most hilarious videos I’ve seen.

New York City has a problem. Now, I know it’s not a problem isolated to this particular city, nor even this country. I am also aware that London has its fair share of it too, but I swear it is nowhere near as bad as it is here (despite AJ’s protestations to the contrary. She’s supporting her hometown, I get it. But Jesus Harry Christ people, get the fuck off your phones.

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Exploring the Amazon

I recently talked about what to pack when moving abroad, with the tactic acknowledgment that you can’t bring everything with you, and the stuff. that you do send after you will arrive months later.

What this means for most people is that you’re going to have to buy an awful lot of stuff at the other end, and that can be a daunting task. Thankfully, we have online shopping. In particular, we have Amazon.

I’ve used Amazon for years on and off, as I’m sure most people reading this have too. Once I got here though, Amazon became our lifeline. As it turns out, they now stock damn near everything.

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America doesn’t want me to have a phone

When I moved to America, I decided that – to begin with – I would just use my corporate phone for everything. It seemed simpler and one less thing to have to buy and setup, plus it would let me wait for Apple’s announcements and see what those brought.

In November, I decided it was time to get myself a phone and split my personal stuff out from the company device, which always left me feeling a little uncertain.

You would think that, after having secured a bank account, a social security number, a place to live, and a house full of furniture that acquiring a phone would be easy.

You would be mistaken.

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