Now, this is a story all about how
My life got flipped-turned upside down
And I’d like to take a minute
Just sit right there
I’ll tell you how Iberia’s the worst airline in the air

So I’ve chronicled our absolute clusterfuck of a journey home in my last cruise post, and I wish that was all that there was to say.

A few weeks after we returned home from the cruise, we were back on the road again, this time to Madrid. I know, I know; posting about terrible experiences whilst travelling to beautiful countries. Sucks to be me, right?

Well, whatever your current situation as you read this, I think you’ll all agree that if you pay for a service, it’s right and reasonable to expect that service to be rendered properly. Iberia are the masters of rendering their services improperly. Let’s talk about it.

This was a work trip; AJs company was having an event in Madrid, and ‘plus ones’ were invited. She had booked flights weeks before our cruise – before we swore never to fly Iberia ever again – so we were stuck with that airline. On the Uber right to the airport I made a joke about wondering how long it would be before Iberia found a way to screw us over again, and the answer was ‘about 30 minutes’.

The trip had been booked through a third party – I think Expedia – using relevant information provided by her company. Several other staff from her company were also on that flight. When we arrived to check-in, we were told matter-of-factly that we hadn’t paid for any baggage.

Who books a one-week transatlantic trip and doesn’t pay for baggage?

AJ argued, but the receipt from Expedia showed nothing but the price. She couldn’t find any information about the booking specifics online, so we begrudgingly paid extra fees for our bags.

We grumbled but went through security and got on the plane. When we got to Madrid, we sat waiting for our double-charged bags to arrive. I picked mine up relatively quickly, but hers was nowhere to be found.

After waiting and talking to other people from the flight, we discovered that about 20-30 other bags had been left behind in Boston. We were furious, others were furious, and Iberia promised everyone that the bags would be on the next flight out from Boston the following day.

The following day, no bags arrived. The baggage tracker – sold to us as the solution to the problem – showed that the bag had still not been found. Several irate calls to Iberia’s customer helpline yielded nothing but them reading the same information I was reading on the website.

The next day – Monday – and still no baggage. According to the tracker, it still hadn’t been found.
At this point, I joined Twitter to complain directly to Iberia, and it was the only way to escalate the issue. They, however, were still of no help.

We went into town and spent several hundred euros on new clothes. I had everything, but I would be working out of a hotel room the whole week. AJ had a packed schedule of work events from Tuesday through Friday and had literally nothing to wear but the clothes she had on when we took the flight.

On Wednesday, AJ checked her voicemail and had a message from our pharmacist. JetBlue had found our bag at Boston Logan. It had no tags anymore, so they opened it to see if they could identify it and found some of her medication. They called the pharmacy, who called her to let her know what was happening.

The whole time, Iberia claimed that they were still looking for the bag. We wouldn’t see it again until we got back home on the weekend and picked it up from JetBlue.

The rest of the week passed without issue. Madrid is beautiful.

On Friday night, we took our Covid tests – a similar brand to the ones we’d used when returning from the cruise, and went to the airport on Saturday. We got there a full 3 hours before the flight was due to board, as per the recommendations for international flights.

The queues were vast and moved at a glacial pace. The check-in staff showed little to no urgency, and we trudged slowly toward the check-in desks. When we arrived, we produced our documentation and our Covid tests.

“These aren’t valid”, we were told.

We protested, saying we’d used similar ones when we flew home a few weeks ago. Iberia staff accused us of lying, saying that that was impossible. We would be forced to get tests at the airport, for 100 Euro each. We were mightily pissed but had no choice but to go and get new tests. The queue for the testing center was also massive, and we started stressing that we’d miss our flight.

As we finished testing, we were emailed by Iberia. They had rescheduled our flight. Forwards. That’s right, they moved our flight up by 40 minutes. We rushed back to the check-in desks to find 90% of the ones we’d been at had been closed. By the time we tried to check-in, the member of staff told us that we were too late, that it was our fault for not having the right Covid tests, and once again called me a liar when I told him that they’d rejected perfectly good tests.

We now had to reschedule our flights, paying once again for baggage that we’d already paid for, and return to the hotel, paying for another night so that we could fly home the following day.

That night, the USA dropped its Covid-test requirement for entry, as was heavily rumored in the run-up to that weekend.

We went back to the airport the following day – now with new test results that we’d obtained at the hotel – where we were asked for proof of the test, despite it no longer being required for entry to the US. We checked with colleagues also on that flight – they were not asked. Clearly Iberia just wanted to fuck with us more.

We arrived back home later that day and collected the missing luggage from JetBlue. Sure enough, the Iberia tags we’d watched them attach at check-in had been torn away. We vowed never to fly Iberia again.

It took months and further Tweets to get all of our clothing refunded. I had made multiple complaints and requests for compensation for all of the various fuckups on both of our trips. Just a few weeks ago, I received emails from Iberia asking us to confirm our identity so that they could send some money back our way – eight months on from the original incidents.

Twitter was illuminating. Iberia’s feed is full of irate passengers who have had baggage lost, misplaced, opened and items stolen, and on and on. They appear to be entirely out of control of their own operation.

I loved Spain, and I will happily return in the future. But it will never be on that piece of shit airline, that treats its customers like hot garbage.