What a year.

I didn’t post a lot of perpetual content on Instagram this year. 10 posts. I wanted to put something together for the inevitable ‘end of year review’, but as I started with my original idea of a Reel with a rapid flip-through of some key moments, I began to realize just how packed a year 2022 had been, and how much joy had been in it.

At times towards the end of this year it felt like all I did was work. Work became all consuming, all encompassing. It was all I would allow myself to think about, and usually it’d be focusing on how much of a shit job I was doing. I was a terrible manager. I was neglecting the technical side of the job because I was so caught up with the personnel side, and as the weeks went on, more and more work piled up. It came like waves smashing against the shore, and seemed to happen just after I’d picked myself up from the last one and was beginning to get my bearings.

My ‘Achievements for 2022’ list for most of the year read as such:

• Survived.

I take my work seriously. It’s literally one of the reasons I’m even allowed to be here in the US, and it gives me purpose.

But it’s been taken too seriously. I’ve neglected friendships and relationships, all because every buzz on the Apple Watch and notification on my phone triggers a spark of anxiety that “here’s another task for you”. “Here’s somewhere else your already distracted brain needs to focus on”. “If you don’t reply now, somebody’s going to be upset with you”, followed by “What if it’s work?”
And so I’d check, and it would just be a friend saying “Hey, what’s up? Just checking in.” And I’d sigh with relief, because that didn’t require an immediate response like Slack or E-Mail or Zoom, so I could ignore it and relax for a minute. And ignoring things on my phone became a coping mechanism for the onslaught of ‘work stuff’.

The more stressed I got, the more I ignored everything else.

This worked great, except whilst I was balancing the stress from work by dosing myself with dopamine by ignoring everybody close to me, I was also suffering from crushing guilt that I was doing it, and letting go of relationships that were actually worth something.

If you’re reading this, maybe I did this to you, and I’m sorry for it. Words, however, don’t mean much. I’m going to attempt to rebuild some of those bridges in 2023.

So what did happen in 2022 anyway?

Oh that’s right, we got engaged. After almost a *year* of planning, scheming, failed schemes, more scheming, more failed schemes, and a sudden flurry of snow, I popped the question.

All of that stuff you just read? AJ is the one who keeps me afloat. I will be forever grateful that the fates conspired to throw us together, and for every crazy thing that’s happened since then. The rest is going to be going in my speech, so that’s all you get.

January saw us try a high-end restaurant’s tasting menu, and almost saw me faint at an almost four-figure bill. I’m not sure it was worth the money, but it was very very good.

February was the start of our personal training journey, I prevailed as the ultimate Dinner Detective (very fun night) and it snowed a bunch.

March kicked off in New York, where we went to #SleepNoMore and had an incredibly fun experience. FIRMLY recommend if you’re in the city! We painted Marge Simpson’s whilst necking some strong cocktails at 10 in the morning and ate dick waffles. I finally tried Katz’s Deli. The pastrami is to die for. The month ended with a flight to London then Dublin to renew my visa for the last time, a fascinating bus tour around Dublin, and some long overdue time with friends & family.

April saw the return of the sun and sitting on the balcony (just once or twice) but the absolute highlight was seeing Biffy Clyro live. I didn’t think the opportunity would come now that I live in the States, but it was a great night and they were on top form.

May was the realization of a gift we gave ourselves in 2020: a 14-night cruise around Southern Europe. Spain, France, Italy, Croatia, and Slovenia. The cruise itself was an absolutely wonderful experience. It started badly – we were both sick, followed by airline fuckups all the way through to Barcelona. On the way home, British Airways cancelled one of our return legs after we had spent hours dashing from London Gatwick to London Heathrow, Iberia proved themselves to be total useless fuckwits, and we somehow found ourselves on a flight home after spending about 9 hours at the airport.

June had us perform a quick turnaround and fly back out to Madrid, for AJs work event. Madrid is an amazing city and I’d love to return. Of course, Iberia screwed us again by charging for already-paid-for baggage and subsequently losing one of them. On the return journey they refused to accept our Covid tests, forcing us to get new ones, moved the flight up whilst we were being tested, and then told us we couldn’t check into it. Seriously, that airline is terrible.

July gave us a chance to go down to Long Island for 4th July celebrations, and see AJ’s dad graduate from his MBA class. We’d also decided to move, because the year wasn’t busy enough, and … we did.

August was a difficult month. AJ was spending it in Long Island to look after her mum, who had taken ill, but when she arrived Cooper – the family dog – was also very out of sorts. I immediately went down to help, and spent a week there making sure Cooper was OK. I spent the next few weeks back in Boston living alone, until AJ returned – along with Cooper, yep we have a dog now – to put our little family back together.

September was when we got to see ODESZA live, and they blew our freakin’ minds. Their latest album The Last Goodbye is excellent, and their live show was one of the best I’ve seen – probably second to Coldplay at Wembly in 2016. The artwork we purchased on the cruise finally arrived – yep, we’re art collectors now – and finished off the walls in the lounge.

October took us to Los Angeles to see Above & Beyond’s Group Therapy #500. We’d watched #400 and #450 both take place in London on YouTube and were determined to get to one this year. I’d secured the tickets months prior, and we’d been looking forward to it for almost the whole year.
It was an incredible experience, and made two of the 10 Instagram posts for 2022.

November wasn’t much of anything. Things had started to become more ‘work focused’ for us both around August, so we were deep in it now. Everything on my camera roll is a picture of Cooper or something else at home. The unseasonably nice weather allowed us a picnic with friends, but that was about it. AJ was sick for most of the month, at one point getting bad enough that we spent an evening in the Emergency Room (thankfully everything turned out fine).

December I took a trip to our office in North Carolina, which was a nice chance to reconnect with a couple of the guys there, and also have a week of working at a different office – the change of scenery helped.

And then, of course, the proposal. My “it can’t go wrong this time, surely” plan was for us to go into Boston to Devauxe, a lovely French restaurant we enjoy, whereupon I would propose.
That was the day it decided to snow. Faced with an uncertain journey to the restaurant and an almost impossible journey home, we decided we’d have to cancel.
Not wanting to let yet another day go by, I decided to improvise, and found myself on one knee outside, in the snow, asking The Question.

She said yes 🙂

And really, for all of the stresses and strains of the year (and there’s plenty I can’t or won’t talk about here), that’s all that matters. The one constant Good Thing in my life has said yes to being there forever. All in all, 2022 was pretty damn awesome.